911. We all know about it, have even used it once or twice. On Sunday, someone had to dial 911 for me.
I was walking with a colleague to my car after working all day at Talbots. She is young and very fit, and was leaping up the three block hill like a gazelle. Me, not so young (and not fit in the slightest), was trying to keep up with her. Mistake. I forget sometimes that I have chronic asthma. I probably will not do that again. Suddenly, with a speed that was truly remarkable, I could not breathe. Could not breathe, could not speak, could not do anything but grab onto the side of a parked pick up truck and ease myself down onto the pavement. That is just about all I remember for a bit.
The next thing I remember through the desperate gasping for breath I was going through, was a young policeman saying "Her lips are blue". He asked me some questions, but I couldn't answer him back. I had managed to pull out my inhaler, but was too weak/uncoordinated to get the thing to my mouth. Nothing seemed to be working except for my sweat glands, which were doing triple duty while my lungs heaved. Soon the paramedics arrived, and they knew just what to do. In a blink of an eye, they had a face mask on me with a breathing tube full of asthma medicine. It took awhile, but soon I could get a breath, even if it wasn't quite as big a one as I would have liked.
I was less confused, but still got my address wrong when asked. It was really hard to say more than one or two words at a time. I did notice a small crowd of local residents staring at me, and realized that I was somehow lying half under a big blue pick up truck. Still not sure how that happened. Shortly, I was trundled into the ambulance, my stalwart little co-worker continuing to hold my hand and say soothing things. Husband was summoned, and I began to think that maybe I wasn't going to die right that minute after all.
I was advised to go to the hospital. I didn't want to go to the hospital. You want to know why? My husband recently lost his job, and we have had our health insurance converted to Cobra. Only we don't have any new insurance cards yet. While I was lying there in the ambulance, grateful to be alive, I was worrying about how much this whole episode was going to cost us. Thousands I am sure. Go to the hospital? Add a few more thousand dollars to the bill? No. Please.
And you know what undoubtedly contributed to the entire asthma attack? The fact that we no longer have prescription coverage and that I have been cutting my asthma medicine in half to make it last longer.
I hear of fixed income senior citizens having to do that in order to afford their medications. They just take half and make it last twice as long. I always felt so sorry for the poor old folks who had to do that. And now I was doing it. Something is very wrong People. Every one of us in this country should be able to have the medications and health care we need. My blog has never been a format for political opinion, but I am so ready for a change in our health care. That is all I am going to say about that.
After a time, I was released to my husband and soon was home in the bosom of my family. Chest was still tight, I was a bit light headed, but I lay on the couch for an hour or so and then was escorted to bed. Today I feel fine, but the memories that linger are strange. I am afraid to sleep, in case my breathing stops. And I am back to the full dose of all my asthma medications.
Yes, I am still worrying about how we will pay for this sudden and unexpected medical emergency. But I am almost as concerned about the fact that I was on display for half of Carmel to gawk at while I was lying in the street half under a pick up truck, wearing a shirt that said "Ask me about my pants". (Talbots is making us all wear these shirts to promote their newly designed pants fit). Also, now my co-worker knows my age (gratifyingly 10 years older than she was guessing) and I am going to be in the Carmel Pine Cone Police Report. "Female collapsed on Mt. View near Torres due to asthma attack. Medical treatment given, hospitalization refused". Along with other police reports such as "Neighbor dials 911 to complain of next door wind chimes" and "Dog defecates on the block of Dolores between Seventh and Eighth. Owner warned to carry poo poo bags".