First of all, a heartfelt thank you to all of you who sent me emails and messages of condolence. Your thoughts and prayers are much appreciated, not just by me, but by everyone in my family. This loss was terrible for all of us, and your encouragement and comfort just means the world.
I have found myself strangely numb this past week. Nothing seems interesting or fun. Normal activities are burdensome and difficult. I can't concentrate on reading, I sit in front of tv and couldn't tell you what I was watching five minutes later. Forget about sewing. The effort just seems like it is too much.
So, the strangest thing managed to capture my interest. I was mindlessly surfing the internet and came across a few blog posts by people who keep personal planners (or organizers). I have always liked the low tech approach to personal organization, and am a list maker. One particular planner stood out: the Erin Condren Life Planner. They aren't cheap, but I went ahead and ordered one anyway.
When you lose a loved one, life seems pretty out of control I guess starting a new organization system was appealing because it gives me the feeling that on some level I can manage my life in an orderly and methodical fashion. Psychologically, it seems obvious why controlling anything at the moment would be important.
The package was delivered by Fed Ex three days later. That is the actual mailing container pictured above. How pretty is that?
When I opened the box, this is how the items were presented. You know how I am about pretty presentations. This really lifted my spirits.
Here's my new planner, along with a box of colored markers the company tossed in for free. I thought the title on the cover was quite apt. "And the adventure begins". A positive message for a fresh start. I spent a few hours trying to figure out how I was going to organize the planner, and got out some pretty and fun stickers which I used to decorate the upcoming weeks pages.
This may seem like a fairly mindless pursuit, but honestly, it is all I am good for. And those blank sections are full of possibilities. I will get through this week.