Have you ever seen a movie that literally changed your life? Think about this for a bit. Really think about it. Then blog or email me about it! I would love to know what meant something to you.
I found this such a compelling topic for thought, that I have challenged my husband and son to a dialog discussing the subject at length. Our responses were so different, and so interesting. When I was a young girl and saw Breakfast At Tiffany's, I determined that I would from that day on be a person of style and grace and character, just like Audrey Hepburn/Holly Go Lightly. The fact that she pushed love away was lost on me at the time, I just loved her look. Seeing the movie again, I found her sad and lost. But still damned attractive. Interesting note--Marilyn Monroe was originally picked to star in this movie. If that had been the case, I doubt it would have had the same impact on me.
When I was a bit older, and in college, I saw two movies that had even a greater impact on my persona. One was The Pawnbroker, a movie about loss and the subsequent emotional detachment of an individual who had suffered in a concentration camp. Rod Steiger, who played the Holocaust survivor, experienced countless horrors at the hands of the Nazis, losing his family and best friend. After the war, he emigrated to America where he opened a pawn shop in Harlem. There, he witnessed many atrocities and much violence, but remained curiously detached from the suffering of others. You would have thought he would have much empathy and compassion, but it was quite the opposite. He had steeled himself to the meaninglessness of life. At the movie's end, the loyalty and sacrifice of his shop assistant provokes him to an act of self mutilation that causes him at last to feel pain and awareness and empathy. These were topics that had never crossed my mind in my entire life. The movie was so eye opening and consciousness raising that I have thought of it often over the years. How cruelty and meaness only perpetuate numbness and detachment and therefore more cruelty. Wow. This brings back some painful thoughts. Self discovery isn't always about fun, fashion, and frivolity.
The other movie that influenced me was one starring Terrence Stamp and Samantha Egger, called The Collector, based on a novel by John Fowles. This movie was all about different sorts of love, and mainly that you cannot MAKE someone love you. In this movie, a nerdy butterfly collector kidnaps a beautiful art student and is determined that if he showers her with lovely things, she will come to love him. He wants to own her, as something in a collection. This movie is so complicated--it has to do with class differences, differences in attitudes and expectations and the fact that love is often just a huge delusion. The plot even has parallels to Shakespeare's work The Tempest. I loved the movie intellectually because it was so challenging , but also because it addressed the topic of loving someone for inauthentic reasons. It reminded me of being a kid and catching a lightening bug in a jar, planning to make it my pet, only to find when I woke up the next morning, it was dead in the jar.
My son's most influential movie was one called Harold and Maude, a cult classic about a very disturbed, death obsessed young man who ultimately befriends and falls in love with an 80 year old woman. This movie is all about love and the fact that it transcends what society deems acceptable norms. Love for the right reasons, see the true essence of those personalities with whom you interact. Don't be "normal" and love what society tells you to love. Possessions and life are temporary, is what Maude
teaches Harold. It is what you do every day with your life each and
every day that matters most. An intersting side note, Maude too was a Holocaust survivor, but instead of becoming numb and detached like the character in the Pawnbroker, embraced life with a zest that was amazing. If you have not seen this movie, rent it immediately!
I think I am just going to have to tag a few people, I am so interested to hear what movies they say have influenced them. So, I tag Susan of Blackberry Creek, Karen Dianne of Lee Haven, and Carol of Brown Quilts. Also, my sister Mary, if you are reading this, email me what you think--I would love to know.